GRUMPYBUMPERS.COM FAQ

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Q: Who are you? A: We are Andrew and Diana, two random 20-somethings sitting around trying to think of catchphrases. The actual shirts and stickers are printed and mailed by a company called cafepress.com. Q: Why is this here? A: We basically got really tired of saying to ourselves "hey, you know what would be a really cool idea if someone would put it on a t-shirt?" and decided to start putting these things on t-shirts ourselves. Q: Why is there so much political stuff? A: Andrew likes political stuff. Deal with it. Q: Why is there so much pet-related stuff? A: Diana likes pets. Deal with it. Q: You make fun of the little magnetic ribbons, but the money from those ribbons go to good causes. A: Uh, okay, maybe some of the money goes to some kind of cause for some of the ribbon sticker things, but mostly the money is going to Walgreens and whoever it is that makes magnets. Look, you want to help cure cancer? Give money to the American Cancer Society. You can donate to them here. You want to do something for American troops? Go to anysoldier.com or any of the many other charities set up for that exact purpose and make an online donation. That way, 100% of the money goes to the troops, instead of 3% going to the troops and 97% going to letting the world know how patriotic your truck is. Q: I don't get the "bullshit" sticker. A: There is a recent fad in government where a city (or sometimes a country) will single out a single dog breed and ban it out of a perception that the breed is dangerous. Unfortunately most of these breed bans are not the result of a dangerous dog breed, but the fault of irresponsible pet owners or even just a figment of media hype. Pit bulls are the breed most commonly targeted by this trend, hence the joke. Q: What's "designerdogbreeds.com"? A: You may notice a "designer dog breeds" link at the top of the page. This is a link to a calendar Diana made which has a humorous take on a different popular "designer" dog breed (such as the pomchi, and labradoodle-- yes, it's actually called a "labradoodle") on every page. It didn't quite fit into grumpybumpers itself, so we gave it its own website. Q: I don't get the "April 24" sticker. A: Exactly. So seriously, the "Remember April 24" sticker is an attempt to mock certain other bumper stickers I've seen lately exhorting the reader to remember [some date where a news event happened]. The point is, regardless of stickers these dates in fact get very quickly forgotten. Within, say, 50 years, a date which should have forever lived in infamy tends to be either totally unknown or just an "it's sometime in December, isn't it?" kind of thing. April 24 is one such date; it was the day of the 1846 attack on U.S. troops by Mexican forces which, amidst the cry that the Mexicans had "shed American blood upon American soil", lead to war between America and Mexico. (Some peacenik anti-war hippies such as Rep. Abraham Lincoln (W-IL) claimed American blood hadn't been shed on American soil, and the entire thing was a planned, provoked fraud engineered by President James K. Polk because he really just wanted to start a war, but whatever.) Now, considering this ought to be a pretty heinous act, and considering the undeniable historical significance of this date (the war basically doubled the size of America's territory, and touched off a political squabble that basically grew into the Civil War), don't you think this is a date which people would or should remember? Well, they did. For awhile. But that was a while ago. These days, nobody does remember April 24. Hell, I didn't, I had to look it up when I made the sticker. The original version of the sticker said "Remember February 15", after the day of the 1898 attack on the USS Maine (well, okay, maybe it was just a boiler explosion, but whatever), which galvanized the country and touched off the Spanish-American war, but that had to go because too many people thought this was some kind of reference to Valentines' Day. Q: Is there any other information you really want to convey but which does not easily fit into the question/answer format of an FAQ? A: Actually, yes. The t-shirts with maps of the United States on them include content which is copyrighted by the libre maps project, and as a result the content of those shirts is available under a Creative Commons license. If you want the psd files, or really if you have any other questions, email us.

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